𝓢𝓲𝔁𝓽𝔂𝓽𝓱𝓸𝓾𝓼𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓫𝓮𝓮𝓼 @Ophillous@cryptids.online

i really glad mastodon has hashtags so we can dunk on people who use hashtags

retail cryptid: there are two $100 bills in your register, and every other denomination is exactly at start-of-day supply

I really admire lesbian love on this site. It’s always like “omg I love my girlfriend uwu 💕 and if anyone has a fUCKING PROBLEM WITH THAT I WILL PERSONALLY STAB THEM”

Feeling sort of vampy mime

undertaker bees are valid...

you pronounce "egg" ˈeg-g because it thas two "g"s in it

somebody needs to put a stop us, straight people have gone too far

i frickin love the lighting in my therapists bathroom (ec)

Any random phrase can be a joke format if you're not a coward

My favorite joke format is "any x can be a yx if you're not a coward"

"I want them to kiss" is honestly my immediate response to any "x v y, who would win" scenario, because someone made this joke on a message board 15 years ago and then we kept reflexively making it on every poll until it just burrowed into my brain

And now... You will be my thesis. Have at you!

While you were off chasing cuties and having fun, I was working on my doctorate in Blade Studies.

The antithesis is stored in the thesis

Who let this strange yelling gremlin into our house

yeah i love lgbt

large
gf
big
tiddy

💖 ✨ ☀ 😊

know what website sucks?

all of them

there are no good websites