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Bee's Crab Story (includes a mild amount of being eaten by crabs) Show more

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My hobbies include:

horny on main
bees II, the sequel to bees
shitposting on mastodon dot com
hoarse voice
horse voice
smile emoji
bees 3: electric beegaloo
biological slime

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what if you jerked off and then I came Show more

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I know SNL is not only reactionary, but also just plain awful, but that one skit where Adam Driver tells the white supremacists that Vermont is actually the best place for them is good.

Phrases i love Show more

like this is why anime avis think they oppressed

i think sometimes people confuse bullying for oppression

Look, I'm an animal. An absolute monster. I vacuum tile floors and don't sweep them. Why on earth would I push dirt around when I could just inhale it with an electric motor?

A Rare Lewd Show more

im teaching my girlfriend how to play magic and this is the best thing ever

okay last card post sorry but

can we talk about this nonsense

also thatโ€™s 100% brynden rivers

wah Show more

Kim Petras has a standing invitation to join Cryptids and that's the tea

If some has 18= in their bio it means you can only follow them if youโ€™re 18. 19th birthday today? Smash that block button, motherfucker.

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Cฬฎอšอ‰ฬžฬผrฬณอ”ฬคฬฒyอ•ฬฑpอขฬฃฬฎtอ˜ฬฌฬ อ…ฬ™อ”iอขฬชฬฃdฬกฬฆฬคอ…ฬฏฬบฬฅsฬซฬ–ฬซอฬฃอ™ฬ— ฬฆฬซฬปOอœอ”ฬฉฬซฬ˜nฬงฬŸฬณฬฃฬปฬŸlฬธอˆฬ–อฬฅฬณอ™iฬฑอ™ฬ˜neฬถฬ ฬ˜ฬฅอš

A small, private instance where a few cryptids may roam and play. Seek, but fear. The whole thing was birthed in a Denny's in 2016.