Pinned toot

me: ok so being trans is like, if you had a stakeboard that was really good at doing kickflips, but instead of kickflips, your skateboard really wanted to do grind rails, because of who it was instead
tony hawk: i told you, im a grown adult, you dont need to use skateboards to explain things to be. also it's 2019 i know what being trans is
me: *pats him on the head* good boy

Pinned toot

i love lurking in the shadows. one of my favorite places to lurk tbh

Pinned toot

trying to lure sailors to their death. its so hard nowadays cuz all the sailors cant stop looking at their phones

Pinned toot

real cookie monsters are a lot scarier than tv would have you believe

Pinned toot

been rewatching the first season of its always sunny and i feel like i forgot just how much scripted comedy used to be based around the premise of "men try to have sec with women, using schemes"

please cw all pacman related posts. my dad was chased around a hedge maze and murdered by a ghost and it brings up bad memories

i failed my vibe check, banned from having vibes for 12 hours. total bullshit

fellas, is it gay to put comedic relief in your drama films? youre literally reminding your audience that they are capable of emotions beyond "somber contemplation"

my mom's favorite part of fight club was that meatloaf was in it

christopher nolan calls other directors gay if their films have more than one tone in them

almost selfboosted this but im sure my crush has better things to do, dont want to bother her

please buy my self help book “what if i simply stopped having a bad one and started having a good one...” in stores now

can we please stan more cis men like mario. mario is a cis legend. he hoards currency and rarely speaks

how can you call someone who has watched 1 anime a weeb

us pol 

there are $40 laminators and $600 laminators and they are indistinguishable

did you know that you have to fill out 4 different pieces of paperwork just to legally change the name of your boobs?

Virginia is for lovers but Utah is for haters!!! Never stepping foot in Salt Lake City until my bitch-ass Uncle Stuart either moves or dies!

i love calling boys "sweetheart." its such a power move. its like im rubbing in their faces that i am A Women, Arbiter Of Sweetness. i have the power to know the exact sweetness of your heart. dont like it? well then you can go fuck yourself, sweetheart

Follow Friday My friends Social skeleton “cool s” and Andrew Yang

Show more
C̮͚͉̞̼r̳͔̤̲y͕̱p̣̮͢t̬̠̙͔͘ͅi̪̣͢d̡̦̤̯̺̥ͅs̫̖̫͍̣͙̗ ̦̫̻O͔̩̫̘͜ņ̟̳̣̻̟l̸͈̖͍̥̳͙i̱͙̘ne̶̠̘̥͚

The social network of the future: No ads, no corporate surveillance, ethical design, and decentralization! Own your data with Mastodon!