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my new plan for when i have a problem with what someone says is to directly speak to them about it, avoiding waves of unnecessary drama from people who know nothing about what happened

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when my pee stream splits and i make a mess in the church bathroom

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@gayalien lol n00b u just dont understand how a 1337 gamer like me can maintain my 9000k killstreak for 18hrs at a time on our communal front room TV console

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@gayalien

if i lived with you i would harbor so much resentment for you

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one day dusty will flutter to my shoulder and i will know peace

imagining living with some people from the fediverse and i am laughing at how much my door would be closed

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@gayalien yeah, let’s talk about getting murry purry

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anyone wanna talk about becoming a furry. anyone wanna talk about having a tail

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@gayalien time to sit back relax and wait for it to be thursday night

hmm... if i was a furry? i would want to be an elephant. i'm not a furry though and i don't even fucking know why i'm posting this.

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going town, town for going. pull in the station and you gotta leave right away. it's bathed in golden light, filtered through the pines. but don't dawdle. you have to go

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who the fuck is blasting post Malone outside its easter you fucks

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@gayalien im not asking conner. im gonna wash @simmo's goddamn feet whether he likes it or not

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@gayalien

when you think about, it Jesus was the Joe Biden of his time

look, i'm not saying that jesus was an asshole or anything. that is NOT what i'm saying! what i AM saying is that it is not cool to go around asking to wash people's feet

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@selontheweb
MOSES: parts the red sea with a little stick, leads people to freedom through the desert
JESUS: won't stop turning water into wine and asking to wash people's feet

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Just had a very productive business meeting at the taqueria by CJ’s house!

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You know those people who are like “I grew up in the city so I never learned how to drive.” I’m like that but for potty training.

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Rabbits don’t lay eggs. Very few people know this

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C̮͚͉̞̼r̳͔̤̲y͕̱p̣̮͢t̬̠̙͔͘ͅi̪̣͢d̡̦̤̯̺̥ͅs̫̖̫͍̣͙̗ ̦̫̻O͔̩̫̘͜ņ̟̳̣̻̟l̸͈̖͍̥̳͙i̱͙̘ne̶̠̘̥͚

A small, private instance where a few cryptids may roam and play. Seek, but fear. The whole thing was birthed in a Denny's in 2016.