I like the simple things in life. A cool drink, a warm heat lamp, and the fall of man.
im a writer for the NYT now!! check out the first sentence of my latest article for free :)
idealism—the conceptual framework wherein things can be better than they currently are—is poisoning our political discourse.
Me: Hey boss can I have my lunch near the middle of my shift instead of two hours before I leave?Boss: sure! *Schedules my lunch literally an hour before I leave during an 8 hour shift*
Me: Hey boss can I have my off days together?Boss: Sure! *Schedules my off days every way possible except together*
Love having an inconsistent work schedule.
This podcast SUCKS
Joe Biden is gonna get on TV with his practiced concerned look and say "our concentration camps need to be humane"
Voting? How am I supposed to do that from my mountain forest cave?
@reptilian_intern i mean it's fair right
i think she meant someone else and not the other thing that my brain is ruined about
Food; dieting (-) Show more
Literally the BIGGEST obstacle in this calorie cutting venture is fried chicken. I love it so much. :((((
MCU spoilers Show more
As of AVENGERS: ENDGAME, more time has passed in the MCU than has passed in the actual main universe that most Marvel Comics stories take place in - assuming that IRON MAN takes place in 2008 and SPIDER-MAN: FAR FROM HOME takes place in 2023.
cw very hot take about abuse, wear your safety goggles for this one Show more
women can be abusive
girlfriENDboyfriENDthey all have an end...
SPLATOON 2 doesn't have an ENDyour move, non-gamers
some people are the equivalent of the nintendo switch online service and it's something they'll just have to live with
yall stupid motherfuckers like memes?
Very very lewd Show more
There is no better ego boost than them not being able to walk right after you're done.
This person LITERALLY walked up behind me mid-selfie and said “looks good” fucking END ME (selfie, no ec)
@spookcentral jean valjean's true crime
What if I was dying of hunger, and there was a sandwich on the other side of the picket line? Would it be ok then?
A small, private instance where a few cryptids may roam and play. Seek, but fear. The whole thing was birthed in a Denny's in 2016.