the entirety of human life can be experienced while wearing either of these hats

@selontheweb putting on my indoors cap to go out, returning home and changing into my outdoors cap

@selontheweb standing in the doorway with each of these hats in one hand, donning and doffing them in rapid succession

@selontheweb What happens to you if you wear the wrong hat for the wrong environs?

You don't want to know.

@radicalrobit @selontheweb *Sighing, I volunteer myself as a guinea pig, that humanity might not make a fatal mistake. I don the indoor hat and immediately walk outside. At first, nothing happens, and I turn around to give the thumbs up, just as a wrathful god strikes me with a blinding flash of lightning. All that's left of me is a pile of smoldering ash, and the "Indoors" hat, completely untouched.*

@selontheweb where's the hat for when you're in the middle of a door (not door*s*, just a singular door)

@selontheweb keeping a liminal space cap in my back pocket for emergencies

nonsense about doors 

@selontheweb how do you feel about patios? Personally, I'm a fan.

@selontheweb the entirety of human life can be experienced while wearing both of these hats, if you so desire

no one can stop you

@selontheweb no hat for in between doors?? I spend a lot of my time in between out and in...

@selontheweb wearing the blue hat while posting on my instance and breaking every law ever written

@selontheweb calmly asphyxiating as I perform an orbital EVA with the Outdoors hat as my only headgear

@selontheweb what about a gazebo? never mind, outdoors, silly question

@selontheweb @venko how much space does a freestanding door have as its indoor area

@ben @selontheweb
wearing both hats as I pass through the threshold and collapse reality once and for all

@chillgamesh @selontheweb
um actually there's a door on the gazebo but go off I gUESs????????????????????/

@venko
a screen door is nothing but a bead curtain that got a attitude
@selontheweb

@caymanwent @selontheweb
I think about this hat every like 3 months or so and never end up buying it lmao

@venko @selontheweb

With another election coming up, I'm going to need to switch to a non-red hat.

Problem is, habitually-wears-the-same-hat-since-college is as close as I get to an interesting personality.

I think you've just shown me the solution.

@venko @selontheweb You love HATS. Because all bros love HATS, and that's what you are. A bro.

@selontheweb i'm gonna put one on frontwards and the other overtop that one backwards to look like sherlock holmes

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